A possible title for your autobiography…. “Army Brat to Americana Queen.”
If you’re gonna enrich us incrementally with these amazing stories and insights, I feel it’s only fair that we have a hard bound book (+ an audiobook as well….But on CD 💿 or Vinyl), with a soundtrack, as well.
My husband & I are HUGE fans your music and I am now also your empathetic sibling in the large family of Army Brats! I am also from Texas, I am the 3rd sister out of 4, 5 years older than you are. My Dad, a Retired (and deceased) Army Col, fought in Korea as a young man, pre my Mom and then again for 2 tours in Vietnam, then with 4 daughters. Your military family recollections mirror mine in so many ways and triggered so many emotions reading them. Thank you for sharing them.
Recording the reel-to-reel tapes for my Dad (where my Mom would stand over us like a Stage Mother, scolding us to only smile and say HAPPY THINGS for Daddy…no crying, nothing heavy. And we’d gather round to listen what he sent back to us, hanging on every word and the timber of his beautiful, strong voice! He also only shared happy things with the girls, and he always closed the part my sisters and I got to listen to with “be sweet to each other, mind your mother, I love you and will be home soon”. Then we would have to leave so my Mom could listen to the part that was just for her, in privacy. Guts me even writing that now, as an adult, for just the tenuous, hopeful theatre it was.
But my Dad did come back and while I cannot relate to your mother’s part of the story (I am sorry), my Dad returned a changed person from what he had seen and had to do. We wanted to be closer to him, having missed him so much. We also hung out around him, just to be close, holding the flashlight while he worked under the hood of his car in the waning light (a car that seemed to always be needing work) or running out with a glass of iced tea when he was mowing the yard in the brutal Texas summers. One of your readers made the comment that being an Army Brat becomes a big part of you, beyond just your narrative. It shaped us all. Thank you so much for this post x
So beautifully written, Kelly! Your best on this Substack for sure. I agree with a previous comment: gather them all together in a book or audiobook. Punctuate them with your songs. Now I see why you are so dang comfortable on a stage! (I'm a theater person too...) My parents were divorced when I was about the same age, and I totally relate to your experience. But what a kind child you were to reach out to your dad and work so hard at developing a different kind of relationship, rather than blaming both your parents for your pain. Good on you for doing that good thing.
Wow…… what we don’t know about people can be so much greater than what we do. I can’t even imagine how all of this affected you. I literally want to cry. I am 57 years old, a man with a wife and two daughters age 20 and 17. I have moments of regret for not being a better husband or father yet I know I have been way better than my parents by a long shot. I have seen you in concert many times and met you during one at Boodles Opera House in NY State. Stunned by your beauty how would anyone know the pain you suffered. Music is an amazing thing. It literally can offer a soundtrack to our lives. I have always wondered about your mother as the absence of mentions suggested that it was not a fond memory. I lived with parents that argued fiercely yelling and screaming but never physical. I had 4 years alone with them as my 3 older siblings used college and what else to run as soon as they could. Supposedly an affair occurred maybe more than one. My father’s doing so my mom would say. They stayed together until his passing i. Jan. Of 2023. He was a nice man but didn’t know what to do with any of us once we got to old. He knew nothing about cars or building things and cussed and yelled a lot when he did try to fix things around the house. My mother pushed me into anything and everything that she didn’t get to do which meant no room for what I wanted and man did I fight her on all of it.
She is still going at 91 but I have very little urge to visit or think about sadly I only want to be with my wife and kids and keep moving forward. Me and my siblings talk occasionally my oldest brother is an alcoholic struggling to rehab at 67. My sister can t find a good man and refuses to see she is the problem and my other brother can is always searching for something and never living in the moment his two daughters might as well not have a father.
I see your pictures of you and your kids and they look like they have always known you love them and would do anything for them. I am sure some of them say you get them while others say Bruce understands them better. Kids love to make us feel grounded lol. I am the only child of the four that never divorced. 21 years married and it’s work everyday but it’s a job I love and I do feel bad when I drive my wife crazy.
I hope the years have helped you heal and I hope you feel love from your children and that someday maybe even a special someone if not already, after all It’s What you Deserve.
Such a bittersweet story. I used to listen to Manilow and that song quite a bit back then too. That's quite a bit of stuff to happen to a 9 year old girl.
This is exquisite, so thoughtfully and lovingly rendered. My wife (also a Texan) owns similar stories (OK, Germany, No VA) of missing her dad, an Army Colonel in Korea and Vietnam — though minus the affair and divorce. That experience surely marks a young life in a way few of us can comprehend.
Whew. I was reading along, reliving my own parallel childhood memories of the fun and adventures to be experienced as a kid growing up with a forest to explore. There was never a dull day unless bad weather interfered. Suddenly, my heart sunk with the emotional whiplash of your mother's decision to leave and your father's subsequent plight. I was fortunate, no, make that incredibly lucky. No broken home to maneuver through at such a terribly tender age. As I grew into adulthood I came to realize that my stable, loving upbringing was far less common than I could have ever imagined. I regret our life stories diverged as you so bittersweetly recalled in Army Brat.
No matter how old I get, and I’m too damn old, I’ll always be an army brat. Waiting for the mail, hoping for a tape from Dad in Vietnam, or Korea, or wherever he was, base housing, the other kids in the same churn, moving every 2 years or so, the life sticks with you.
This was wonderful, but so sad. Can’t imagine leaving my kids. But you sure turned out great! And I, too, loved Barry Manilow! Now, I can’t tolerate it, but did lots of singing to his songs back in the day!
Wow.. what an amazing piece-- I felt like it was a novel... I had no idea about your parents' soap opera.. this is fantastic.. thank you for sharing something so personal!!!
A possible title for your autobiography…. “Army Brat to Americana Queen.”
If you’re gonna enrich us incrementally with these amazing stories and insights, I feel it’s only fair that we have a hard bound book (+ an audiobook as well….But on CD 💿 or Vinyl), with a soundtrack, as well.
Kelly, you are an amazing talent!!!
My husband & I are HUGE fans your music and I am now also your empathetic sibling in the large family of Army Brats! I am also from Texas, I am the 3rd sister out of 4, 5 years older than you are. My Dad, a Retired (and deceased) Army Col, fought in Korea as a young man, pre my Mom and then again for 2 tours in Vietnam, then with 4 daughters. Your military family recollections mirror mine in so many ways and triggered so many emotions reading them. Thank you for sharing them.
Recording the reel-to-reel tapes for my Dad (where my Mom would stand over us like a Stage Mother, scolding us to only smile and say HAPPY THINGS for Daddy…no crying, nothing heavy. And we’d gather round to listen what he sent back to us, hanging on every word and the timber of his beautiful, strong voice! He also only shared happy things with the girls, and he always closed the part my sisters and I got to listen to with “be sweet to each other, mind your mother, I love you and will be home soon”. Then we would have to leave so my Mom could listen to the part that was just for her, in privacy. Guts me even writing that now, as an adult, for just the tenuous, hopeful theatre it was.
But my Dad did come back and while I cannot relate to your mother’s part of the story (I am sorry), my Dad returned a changed person from what he had seen and had to do. We wanted to be closer to him, having missed him so much. We also hung out around him, just to be close, holding the flashlight while he worked under the hood of his car in the waning light (a car that seemed to always be needing work) or running out with a glass of iced tea when he was mowing the yard in the brutal Texas summers. One of your readers made the comment that being an Army Brat becomes a big part of you, beyond just your narrative. It shaped us all. Thank you so much for this post x
Thank you for this messsge. ! It is such a unique life and we are in a special club.
You have a wonderful heart. Thanks for sharing. ♥️
So beautifully written, Kelly! Your best on this Substack for sure. I agree with a previous comment: gather them all together in a book or audiobook. Punctuate them with your songs. Now I see why you are so dang comfortable on a stage! (I'm a theater person too...) My parents were divorced when I was about the same age, and I totally relate to your experience. But what a kind child you were to reach out to your dad and work so hard at developing a different kind of relationship, rather than blaming both your parents for your pain. Good on you for doing that good thing.
Wow…… what we don’t know about people can be so much greater than what we do. I can’t even imagine how all of this affected you. I literally want to cry. I am 57 years old, a man with a wife and two daughters age 20 and 17. I have moments of regret for not being a better husband or father yet I know I have been way better than my parents by a long shot. I have seen you in concert many times and met you during one at Boodles Opera House in NY State. Stunned by your beauty how would anyone know the pain you suffered. Music is an amazing thing. It literally can offer a soundtrack to our lives. I have always wondered about your mother as the absence of mentions suggested that it was not a fond memory. I lived with parents that argued fiercely yelling and screaming but never physical. I had 4 years alone with them as my 3 older siblings used college and what else to run as soon as they could. Supposedly an affair occurred maybe more than one. My father’s doing so my mom would say. They stayed together until his passing i. Jan. Of 2023. He was a nice man but didn’t know what to do with any of us once we got to old. He knew nothing about cars or building things and cussed and yelled a lot when he did try to fix things around the house. My mother pushed me into anything and everything that she didn’t get to do which meant no room for what I wanted and man did I fight her on all of it.
She is still going at 91 but I have very little urge to visit or think about sadly I only want to be with my wife and kids and keep moving forward. Me and my siblings talk occasionally my oldest brother is an alcoholic struggling to rehab at 67. My sister can t find a good man and refuses to see she is the problem and my other brother can is always searching for something and never living in the moment his two daughters might as well not have a father.
I see your pictures of you and your kids and they look like they have always known you love them and would do anything for them. I am sure some of them say you get them while others say Bruce understands them better. Kids love to make us feel grounded lol. I am the only child of the four that never divorced. 21 years married and it’s work everyday but it’s a job I love and I do feel bad when I drive my wife crazy.
I hope the years have helped you heal and I hope you feel love from your children and that someday maybe even a special someone if not already, after all It’s What you Deserve.
Thank You for the music
Noel
Thanks for your message, Noel. I wish you all the best. We just keep on trucking.
Such a bittersweet story. I used to listen to Manilow and that song quite a bit back then too. That's quite a bit of stuff to happen to a 9 year old girl.
This is exquisite, so thoughtfully and lovingly rendered. My wife (also a Texan) owns similar stories (OK, Germany, No VA) of missing her dad, an Army Colonel in Korea and Vietnam — though minus the affair and divorce. That experience surely marks a young life in a way few of us can comprehend.
Wow. I love this. It makes me sad for that little girl, but it is so beautifully written. Thank you for sharing it. ❤️
Whew. I was reading along, reliving my own parallel childhood memories of the fun and adventures to be experienced as a kid growing up with a forest to explore. There was never a dull day unless bad weather interfered. Suddenly, my heart sunk with the emotional whiplash of your mother's decision to leave and your father's subsequent plight. I was fortunate, no, make that incredibly lucky. No broken home to maneuver through at such a terribly tender age. As I grew into adulthood I came to realize that my stable, loving upbringing was far less common than I could have ever imagined. I regret our life stories diverged as you so bittersweetly recalled in Army Brat.
Well done, Kelly
Poignant memories. Thanks for sharing. Some days I want a time machine to go back and visit those times.
No matter how old I get, and I’m too damn old, I’ll always be an army brat. Waiting for the mail, hoping for a tape from Dad in Vietnam, or Korea, or wherever he was, base housing, the other kids in the same churn, moving every 2 years or so, the life sticks with you.
Oh we would gather together and listen to a tape from dad! One year we sang silent night on the tape with him at Christmas. Ugh! So sad!
This was wonderful, but so sad. Can’t imagine leaving my kids. But you sure turned out great! And I, too, loved Barry Manilow! Now, I can’t tolerate it, but did lots of singing to his songs back in the day!
Very touching. Props to your father for stepping up. Thank you for sharing.
Larkin was right about our parents though…
Wow.. what an amazing piece-- I felt like it was a novel... I had no idea about your parents' soap opera.. this is fantastic.. thank you for sharing something so personal!!!